(Unless otherwise attributed, it's mine)
So begins, so ends
All stories, all time
What will I do when I get there?
The story is in the planning
The story is in the journey
Life is the journey to death
And what is a writer
Than clichés repeated
Beyond the starvation lies the hope
That one day we will ink something
That opens the window
To show something other than mountains
And so we jump off cliffs
Hold our guns to the head
Of our clouds
But the opposite direction
Of the problem
And often it is simply madness I am scribbling
But the illiterate cannot tell
Between the word of God
Some read the scribbles
And proclaim greatness
Some read scribbles
And seek darkness
Some read scribbles
And no one really knows
How to decipher the map.
The weight of the world
Rests on F=MA
And we’re spinning fast
Out of control, some would say
But the line between too fast
And fast enough to keep us alive
Is wearing thin
The ocean rocks back and forth
With a heaviness
That increases the density of water
Scrat. Scrat. Scrat. Scrat.
Bum. Bum. Bum. Bum.
Rrat. Rrat. Rrat. Rrat.
Thum. Thum. Thum. Thum.
Lub. Dub. Lub. Dub.
Eyes cannot be ears
No matter how complex the brain
Unless we stand to redefine
Senses in equal opportunity terms
Its difficult to say
Anything when you cannot hear
Your fathers voice
Across the million miles
Oh gosh what’s here that’s not already been said before?
To bounce back and forth
Becomes harder and harder
To tell the difference
But you must go between
The world that exists
Between those 21 orders of magnitude
Perhaps the kids who don’t understand zero
Have it right.
To us 1 is lacking where 1,000,000,000
Has endless possibilities.
But 21 orders of magnitude
Bear enough resemblance to make you wonder
What power lies in an oval?
Those kids have it right
You can never have nothing.
Or rather, I hate needing other people. I’m perfectly happy being perfectly self sufficient, except that’s not possible in this world. No matter how hard I try, there will always be those times where I have to entrust my life not just to chance, but to the whims of another person who’s values and ideas could be utterly opposite of mine.
I hate having to take people at their word, to trust their promises with no way of knowing how much they value those promises.
I hate having to trust that other people value my life as much as I do. Every time I step into a car, I have to trust that some jerk isn’t going to run the red light and kill me.
The Fault in our Stars—John Green
I had somewhat high expectations for this book, having heard so much about it and thus I finished it in about 3.5 hours. I don’t think it resonated with me as much as it has with others because I’m not a 16 year old struggling with the meaning of life, but nonetheless it sparked some musings.
"Some infinities are bigger than other infinities"
Perhaps not the infinite cardinality between numbers
But is not the ocean more infinite
Than the stars to an oceanographer?
Are not words more infinite
Than grains of sand on a beach to a poet?
Is not the time between birth and death
Ever more infinite to the one who lives it
Than the eternity before and after?
- The water pressure- no mater what, its never high enough. ever. And thats a serious issue when you’re trying to wash thick, long hair. I mean, nothing is worse than getting out of the shower and finding shampoo suds in your hair
- The temperature- yeah, for the first two weeks it never got above lukewarm. They fixed that, thankgoodness, but now its borderline scalding, and I suppose some of that is my fault, but seriously, every time someone flushes the toilets the water goes from hot, to DIRECT FROM THE FIRES OF MOUNT DOOOM. What kind of logic is that?!?
- You can’t sing— its just. no. not really accepted. you never know when someone’s gonna pop in, or really, just walk down the hallway and hear you
- I tend to do most of my “brilliant” thinking in the shower, which is really problematic because I can’t write anything down, so I got to taking my notepad with me into the bathroom so that I could just hop out of the shower and jot stuff down, but that doesn’t work because theres nowhere to put a notebook, except on the floor, which is wet, which defeats the purpose.
Decided to ignore the warning about downloading Mavericks and now the wifi isn’t compatible with my computer >:(
Some trickery, and struggles, and joining the secret society of nexus 4 developers I have now tethered my laptop to my phone so yay!
Moral of the story—my most productive point in the day was at 12pm, clearly I should have just called it a day then and not had to deal with all these shenannigins.
I drink my tea as a function of coffee
How much do I want some
How much am I not allowed to have some
How much do I need— or
How much do I think I need the caffiene.
My father toldd me never
To develop a coffee habit
Its bad economics he said
My mother said don’t drink coffee
Its bad for your heart
There are worse things for my heart
Than a little caffiene.
But this poem is not about you,
This poem is about
The first time I tried tea
I wanted to like it
Wanted to be grown-up and proper
Having tea time like the English princesses
But the darkness stared back at me
And swallowed the milk and honey
I poured down its throat but
Refused to submit to my
Sugar coating and I was left
With a sugar packet to wave in defeat.
I have since learned to swallow
Along with the sticky honey lies
And fake “splenda” sweetness.
Coffee is not a taste naturally appealing
Its a bitternesss that you adjust to
To make society’s bullshit easier to swallow.
I dream for a day when green tea flows from faucets
And coffee is a thing of the past
Where no stranger is turned away
And no friend is betrayed.
But until then…
I will rase my daughter to drink milk
So down to the bones will her strength run
To battle the demons she will face
I’ll teach her to balance teacups
And walk the line between dreams and reality
I’ll point out the Starbucks(c)
On every corner so she knows
To arm herself with chocolate
The first time she agrees to meet for coffee.
I’ll tuck her into bed each night
And paint the glaxy on her ceeling
So she knows that stars can still shine
With a black hole at the center of the universe
And I hope that one day
She will see the light shine back out.
I’m looking for someone to love
Looking for someone to hug
Looking for someone to wrap their arms around me
Looking for someone to kiss me first
Looking for someone to be my winter blanket
Looking for someone to make me smile
Looking for someone who makes my heart flutter
Looking for someone who will stand still
While the world spins around me
Looking for someone who will hold my hand
Looking for someone who will help me find myself
Have I told you recently
How much I love?
Yes it was yesterday
But in case you’ve forgotten
I’ll say it again
I love you
More than the ocean loves to wave
More than apples love to fall
More than bees love to hummm
More than the wind loves to blow
More than the sun loves to shine
More than flowers love to smile
More than rain loves to dance
More than leaves love to turn
More than a violin loves to sing
More than people love to argue
More than dogs love to bark
More than cats love to sleep
More than the world loves to turn
I love you
More than anything you could belive
Cherry red lips make me think
Of Katy Perry love songs
Would be our ocean
But your candy I wouldn’t dare
Take from that babyfaced “man”
He’ll lose you fast enough
Without my help
You’ll realize that love
Can withstand the distance
But the vines of change
Will strangle the flowers
Of your love.
When you realize the
Hands that used to fit perfectly
Together with his chin on your
Head lay down and I’ll wipe
The tears from your eyes.
Oh those big brown eyes
What innocence they have seen
Will be shocked to reveal
The harsh world around
As your heart tumbles
My stomach is empty
Of breaths that
Leave my lungs
I wrap myself
In arms of
And wish that I
Could breath in
The voice over
But speakers don’t
So each inhale
Is colder than the last
And each exhale
I will fade
To the eraser mark
Of shadow across
You tried to draw
And negative space
But the lines
Wouldn’t stay on the page
They curled around
Your wrist and up
Like tatoos of worms
The darkness claimed you
Because I left you
But really it was the light
That stole me
And I think I’ve fallen
Off the cloud that
I was supposed to take
To get to the next bus
And all of this is nonsense
But thats the way
You always make me feel